Melt out

Well, as the days go by, it gets warmer and the snow continues to melt. Now it leaves camp a pretty muddy place - I am looking forward to the snow completely melting out and things drying up a bit.

Last week was a very good week - I was chosen to help promote camp in Fort Collins, Greeley, and Boulder. It was great to get out of camp and to get to know the program director Toby a little more. We were able to talk a little bit more about what I thought about my future with camp - and at the time I had told him that I would possibly be interested in committing to the Trips Director Position regardless of what I hear about my graduate assistantship - my thought being that if I got the asisstantship I would be ok with money and not need to get a high paying job, and if I didn't get the assisstantship then I would just stay in Colorado anyway - more on this later.

I was also able to meet up with my good friends Sarah and Nicole from camp in 2004 - I had never really hung out with just them before - it had always been more of a group, but I had a great time and it was good to catch up. I also was able to meet up with Ali - who just moved out hear 2 Saturdays ago and we made plans to meet up over the weekend. On Friday I went to Ali's new place in Denver with Boomer. We were able to go out for drinks a couple of times - one of them to a bar called "Sing Sing" that had two dueling Jazz pianists who would play up to the crowd, make fun of people, and play whatever song you could think of. It was a very energetic place full of people and was actually a lot of fun, despite the fact that we got there a little late and were not able to get a table. I was also able to take boomer to Washington Park that was full of people everywhere walking their dogs. It was great to get Boomer out in an environment like that and to see how he would react. In the beginning he wanted to pull us all over the place, but after about a quarter of the way into it he settled down and walked right next to us.

Now is the time that I am beginning to feel the pressure of deciding what to with my life, but it is very hard because I feel like so much of my life is up in the air right now. As i said above I was and still am definitely interested in becoming the Trips Director here at camp, but that has some serious drawbacks to it - I wouldn't have boomer for 3 months of an important time in his life as far as training goes - I wouldn't get paid much - and if i go to grad school, I wouldn't have much time to find a place before the job ended. Another option is to force the action and say forget about grad school and go straight into the hardcore search for full time employment out here. That is a great option because it would allow me to know what and where I am going and I could put all my energy into that, but it is bad because it then does not allow me to go to grad school, forces me out of the trips job, and forces me to "grow up" another option is to say no to the trips job - move back to Wisconsin find a job to make quick money and then go to grad school regardless of the assistantship. The final option is to do what I have been doing up til now and that is to play the waiting game as far as grad school goes and then make decisions from there - this is the ideal scenario however I fear/know that if i wait that long I am going to miss out on a lot of other opportunities for summer/full time employment (including camp) depending on the outcome of the assistantship.

I think I have made up my mind that I will only go back to Wisconsin if I get my assistantship - so that leaves the decision to whether or not I want to work at camp or not. and that brings up the issue of Boomer which is a difficult one for me - I feel like I should not pawn off responsibility of him despite numerous offers, because I am the one who adopted him and I knew the responsibilities going into it, I also have grown very attached to him and do not want to leave him for three months for that reason, and I also feel like this is an important time for training to happen for him and for him to be brought up behaving how I want him to and responding to my voice/demeanor's.

Lot of choices (as always) the great thing is that I am in the perfect place to sit down, weight my options and make the right choice for me - and as I always say, all of these choices/problems that I speak of are definitely "Good Problems" to have - not a lot of people get the opportunity to have these "problems."